Our mind has the biggest fears

I was watching some random tv documentary last week and it was about «fear». I continued watching because it seemed interesting and it was.  The documentary defined what the word fear was as: negative sensation induced by a perceived threat, basic survival mechanism occurring in response to a specific stimulus, such as pain or the threat of danger.  In summary, being afraid to some situation,  place, person or even objects...  And then, I started to ask myself if I have some kind of fear to something and the answer was yes; of course I have fears, just as everybody, I believe.

The truth of the matter
 is that fear is not real.

But, what are the biggest fears people have? On the documentary and also on Wikipedia, the most commun fears are:  ghosts, not being good enough, social rejection, failure, public speaking, intimacy, death, rejection and success. So, where some of my fears on those commun fears? Yes, some of them were. 

The documentary was trying to find the answer why people have fears and if it were different kinds of fears. Now, there are different kinds and that depends on the person who has it. If one person is surrounded by some success from others, may cause the person to be better or to be overwhelmed by the success from those. As Wikipedia says, the experience of fear is affected by historical and cultural influences. 


The worst part is when our mind plays with us and tries to always push you to the limit of your potencial and what you're able to give. It can be dangerous because your body is trying to develop his best while your mind is telling you that it can be better, which might turns out a depression because the person doesn't have optimism due to his/her family, friends and even himself/herself as the person, knows what people are going to think and say.


Maybe one of the biggest fears is success and the reasons why it's one on the top of the list is because we're always worried about people and family, friends say or think about us if we fail. Taking success as an example, perhaps the fear comes because we've seen successful people as those who are around us and we tend to compare ourselves with them instead of being inspired we can be like them or why not? Be better than them.


That's why not being good enough and not being successful are on the highest fears people have: we compare ourselves with who's around because there's (almost) always someone better than us. And we want always the best and being recognized to inspire others. At least, that's how I see it.

That's the big question.

But there's a fear that the documentary and Wikipedia don't mention, which I believe it should be on the list, and it is the fear of  falling in love: philophobia. The biggest fear, I dare to say. How simple it is to write it but we all know how broken hearted is to talk about it. 


What's the big fear? Why are we afraid to just fall in love? I say it is because we have already been in love and know how it feels like, tastes like and know how it ends like: baddly, awful, never good. And why is that nobody talks about it? Everybody talks and writes how sweet it is at the beggining but not how bitter it is at the end. 


And when you've discovered a new person to fall in love with, your mind plays with the memories of the struggle you had when you were in love before and the fear wins, letting control your feelings and manage a way to step outside this new person so that you don't have to live all the pain again. 


Everybody should manage their feelings and their mind, because they're really different. And to learn how to control your mind to not be played by your fears and dare, dare to to lose those fears you have and at least, try. Everything depends on how you can handle your fears and how you can embrace them to lose them.


Everybody should just dare, just dare to lose some fear and to live feeling better.
As the quote says, «face your fears».


Wikipedia, fear.